sotto voce

After not having written for over four years, after not having sat down, thought out, and decided subject matter for my blog, here I am again.
What shall I write about? To whom shall my musings be addressed? Who in God's name would be interested in my petty, very personal activities and thoughts? I guess I'm the only one!

Daily enlightenment-Monday, September 13.

This feeling of excitement, or perhaps fear that I have about my teaching of improvisation may perhaps be a very good thing. I should really bask in this feeling and not view it as frightening or damaging my soul. After all one of the things I enjoy the most is performing. Teaching is the ultimate performance vehicle because the teacher has a trapped audience. This is a very egocentric activity. There's no question about it.

I sincerely hope that my present deep interest in meditation and Buddhism is not a passing fancy or fad. I certainly am having a great feeling of relaxation and peace from the readings I've been doing.

I hope to keep a daily journal of my feelings and experiences in attempting to merge my spiritual life with my teaching activities.

The Alzheimer's class went very well. The fact that big Al was not there had very little to do with the outcome. It was a lot of joy and accomplishment in the class which was a result of the fact that I really did nothing more than supply situations for improvisation. It looks as if the easiest way for me is simply to bring in ideas for improvising and let them do it. I had just better forget any therapeutic experimentation. There was applause, and a lot of praise from the rest of the staff. A good time was had by all.

I told Lillian that I would not be available next Saturday because of an improvisation workshop. She seemed all right about that because she has other stuff to do also next weekend.

I know this completely out of context but it's something for me to think about." Thinking is not awakened understanding. Awakened understanding is quicker than lightning where there is reasoning there is failure."

I am looking forward to the Stein Tuesday class. I don't have to much preparation for this. I'm just going to reiterate the ideas I used yesterday with the Alzheimer's group. Also I'll give these people a chance to do some of their scenes and monologues. It looks as if there will be several new people there. What a great opportunity it is for these people in my class to get free teaching of acting for nothing. At least I'm getting paid for my services.

Tuesday Sept 14th, 10

Stein went very well. Several absences. Renee very funny in skit in operating theatre.
New actor guy, terrifically good. Requests scene work.......also from Menage w/Susan
Engels.

Got phone call from Holly..........will see! Harbour trip had some plusses. Especially the view of New York Harbor and after sunset when all the city lights begin to go on. Ate a very noisy tapas restaurant at the Seaport. Not bad, decor nice, but noisy as it could be. Probably the noisiest restaurant I ever ate in.

Wednesday, September 15.

Went to school, dropped off papers to be xeroxed. Talked with MM and said much too much about my relationship with LS. Stepped right off the pathway. It seems as if there is continual struggle to maintain one's progress in meditation. I found the men's luncheon group to be extremely boring today, but it was nice to meet with Harry and my dear friend, Pete. At the present time I have a temptation not to go back to the men's group on Wednesdays. But we'll see how I feel. (Went to mFood Emp on Ave 6.

As of 8:34 PM today I have not heard from Holly again. Not to worry - the situation of my attending the workshop on Saturday will work out one way or the other.

Took a walk with BGM to the drugstore. She wasn't as good at it as she was in our walk yesterday.

I should not be concerned about my creative dramatics workshop on Friday. However the kind of person I am, I'm always worried. So I think I will try and draft a lesson plan that will satisfy me about what I plan to do. I believe that there are no really experienced improvisation folks in the class so so I can start them all off on a very basic level.

I got to school around 11:00 AM and ensconced myself in the cafeteria, room 509, I mean. I saw the usual old friends there including Ron and some of the ladies who get there early.
It soon got so noisy when every seat was taken and people were yelling at each other just to be heard, could no longer stand it and went to room 616 to await the beginning of the Proust class. There I met Fred,Ted Gannon, and we had a nice talk. However I couldn't wait for the class to be over. He began to get tedious, especially since we have so much material to cover. I met howie in the lunch room I gave him the handouts
for tomorrow's class. Also spoke with Dolores Rosenthal. She seemed a little harassed and not too happy about her choice of Moby Dick class on Fridays instead of my class.
Because it looks so much like rain I amended my plan to go to the bookstore and came right home. I'm glad I did but I wasted much time watching television, catching up on missed programs and I even watched JJ. Something I was sure I would be able to avoid.
I have yet to hear from Holly..... Even though I called her again. I think I'll go to that workshop the matter what.

The first meeting went very well only two people were absent, Howard Menicoff and Edgar Zingman. Everybody appeared to be happy and satisfied with the class, although I wouldn't be surprised if here and there one or another of the people might've been's smothering disappointment, but I'm not sure that. It was a lot of laughter and everybody was quite cooperative in doing the warm-ups and other exercises. We did pass the clap, singing tag, zips zap zop, they also did machines. We did a number of little improvisational bits. I'm hoping I can keep them interested and challenged. The really pleasant surprise was Monteturo's great talent. Goon River had us hysterically laughing.
I did quite a lot of the demonstrating and I hope it was helpful in getting some of the basic ideas across, ideas such as accepting the gifts of clues from your partner, and avoiding such things as blocking, wimping, and waffling..

All in all, I was pleased.

I do expect to go to the workshop tomorrow. I hope won't be a waste of time and money.

What a beautiful day it was Saturday! The only exception was my disappointment in not being able to go-awaited improvisation workshop. I really had a devil of a time getting around on subways Saturday but I finally ended up at Lillian's apartment. I did get the name of a new book at Barnes & Noble, which I ordered from Amazon naturally. I also bought some biscotti at Farmer's market. I slept over Lillian's and the next day which was another wonderful day, we spent some time at the B&N near her apartment. Then we took a long walk. I had planned to go find the mall in the park, strolled past Bethesda fountain, and end up at the boathouse restaurant. However I got too tired and went back to her place and came home.

Monday, the Alzheimer's class at Stein senior center when very well. Lots of laughter and congeniality. In the morning I had gone to Trader Joe's where a a lot of stuff to
eat.

Tuesday, today I spent most of the afternoon at Stein. The program was quite long, but the part that the group and I did to demonstrate improv was highly applauded and appreciated. There was much laughter and enjoyment on the parts of everybody. When I left at 4:35 PM there were still doing exercises, and I couldn't stand to be there any longer. I remembered that I had an appointment with another actor so I left, unfortunately not getting a chance to stuff myself with all the food.

I watched some TV and I'm catching up on these entries. I do a lot of preparation work to do for Friday and next Monday and Tuesday. I may not go to the men's club tomorrow. I find I'm pretty tired out lately. I just don't have the stamina I used to have. But after all look how old I am and I'm still able to do all the stuff I enjoy.

This is another one of those glorious vibrant fall days. I went to the gym early this morning around nine o'clock. Awfully glad I did because it was good for my right knee. I just have to make room in my life for going more regularly. I do have to work at that particular joint.

I did my meditation walking to the new school. It's amazing how this change in mental and visual orientation can make life seem so wonderful. Just being conscious of the weather and the trees, and the careful attention to one's breath and surroundings can add a lot to our usual tension laden activities.

I went to the men's club where there was some discussion about topics that various members bring out for discussion. The obvious matters were talked over and it looks as if the status quo together with some amendments to add to the topic list will contribute to no change whatsoever.

I got a lunch at food Emporium - picked my salad, a big one, and went over to a tree shaded table, and ate my lunch with full concentration on the meal rather than reading. I believe this will improve my digestion. Not to do too many things at once, be relaxed and conscious of mastication and the pleasure of tasting the food without trying to cram into the occasion to many other activities that distract. I did catch up on most of my reading of Proust.

I am happy to say that I feel fairly confident that I have a go-ahead plan for Friday's improv class at the new school. My only concern now is with the Alzheimer's group on Monday coming up and then Tuesdays drama class.

So I'm looking forward to tomorrow's Proust class and to Mrs. Warren's profession at the roundabout Theatre on 42nd St.

Today I once again took took a meditative walk to school to attend my class on Marcel Proust's great work. I once again that misjudged my timing so I got there a bit too early, but I did have coffee, then left the little Café Room and was able to meditate for little while in room 615 before anyone got there. My dear friend that Ted came in and we had a very pleasant interaction, as we always do.

I walked back To Union Sq., Park and after getting a light lunch at my usual place I found a table in the park under the trees and had a quiet focused lunch. Then I stopped off at Trader Joe's and pick up a few things for the kitchen. For dinner I made two small hamburgers and a dish of onions and zucchini. It turned out very well

I'm looking forward to tomorrow's class at the IRP, and I hope that my carefully thought-out preparation will have a good effect on the class.

Tomorrow night I'm going to the theater with Lillian to see Mrs. Warren's profession by Shaw at roundabout Theatre on 42nd St.

I am doing a lot of reading in my new interests - mindfulness. Seems to be working for me. I was not so frustrated panicky in putting together Bettina's new lamp. So much for the utility of philosophical studies!

The creative dramatics class at IRP was most enjoyable. Then at night the play," Mrs. Warren's profession" was a real treat both in costuming, set design, and acting. I thought the young leading man was miscast but the rest of the actors, especially the English ingénue, were excellent. I stayed over at Lillian's.

Mondays Alzheimer's class went very well. Too bad that big Al is going in the hospital. I hope he will be okay. The rest of the group seems very satisfied and assures me that they want to do more work. The same goes for the Tuesday workshop. I gave them a good scolding about the fact that there should be more serious about learning their acting projects, but many of them would prefer to do just improv.

The Romeo dining group met at Fred Cuba's apartment, then adjourned to a restaurant called Lex. 38 bucks. Noisy as the dickens. I told them that I would need a host on on Tober 26 that's a Tuesday, rather inconvenient for me but I can handle it.

Did not go to the men's group on Wednesday, I decided to take a day off, Thursday, that's today. Tomorrow is my group at the IRP. So I'm pretty busy